Friday, June 24, 2011

Marriage... the why

Ah... this was a topic I had outlined back in December 2010. With one of my closest cousin getting married in exactly 2 weeks, I thought it was absolutely essential to talk about the forbidden topic of Marriage/Shaadi/Lifetime-of-Hell/ whatever you wanna call it.

I'll start with a quick over view of why marriage seems as though it's so much more important in our culture than any other -- it's basically the foundation of our parents being. It's a sad realisation, but our parents will never feel as though they can retire until their children (more importantly daughters) are married. In turn forcing us to get married so our parents can be truly happy.

Now at the age of 23... I've actually started to notice my parents trying to "clean me up", what use to be fun cooking lessons are now a test to see if I'll be able to please a future mother in law. Cleaning your house is no longer a chore, but  now a drill. The worst part? From 17-22 it was all fair game to hit up any ole club/party/parking lot any time, any day... now? My phone (fine my cousins' phone too) gets blown up by my Mother and Father if I'm not home by 9:30. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with my parents... until my mother dropped the "Finish your degree, lose weight, learn how to make a perfectly round roti, we need to start looking for you" line.

FML. My poor parents, I tried to kindly explain to her that marriage is no where in my near future. She had a difficult time understanding this. Don't get me wrong, I love the idea of a wedding, and gifts, and jewelry and double income, and a vacation home -- but a marriage? Please, no thanks.

So.. with two very typical, very conservative desi parents, and one bad ass daughter, what's my solution? *clears throat* MBA. Law School. Yes, that's the only viable solution. Take the academic route, "School is too important to get married, I'll get married later, bla bla, bla". We'll see how far this takes me - who knows, this could always end with me inviting you to my big fat desi wedding in India next year to some "doctor".

Stay tuned, I have about a 100 other perspectives about marriage to share; from failed institution, arranged marriages, to why I'll have a wedding.

So, what are your thoughts on marriage? Go on, don't be shy, share.

ps. You ever notice how a desi bride is NEVER happy on her wedding day?! mmhmm.

1 comment:

adknoss said...

Loove this post. Can't wait to read more about your thoughts on marriage! I can't imagine how difficult it is to have life pressures put upon you. That's... so... crazy.

More please! ^.-